San Cristobal - The Movie

Amber Museum
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San Cristobal, in the province of Chiapas, Mexico, is how I imagine ye oldie towns in Europe to be. Having never been to Europe I can only base such a likeness on films. Which brings me to the following two points:

1. If I were location scouting for the next Mission Impossible or James Bond film - a fantasy that has become bit of a preoccupation of mine given my somewhat cinephilic (though not particularly refined) minds eye and the fact that I’m on a world trip - I’d definitely give serious consideration to San Cristobal.

“Bond, James Bond”

Stairs to Iglesia De San Cristobal
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2. I saw a fascinating documentary about Zapatistas and the history of their relationship with the Mexican government and the Mexican military since the Zapatista militia made it’s self public and occupied San Cristobal on 1 January 1994.

While my fist point is one of fancy and indicative of the fact that a substantial portion of my personality is prone to mindless escapism and thus attracted to simple fast release sugars like 2 dimensional heroes, action plots, lifestyles of the rich and famous and aesthetically appealing people and places, my second point takes us in to the murky, multifaceted politics of the real world.

Farmers Market
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So hows this: I’ll give the second point first, thus complicating the process and giving my self greater integrity before, with my first point, I reveal my shallow bond wannabe self. In the process I hope I can, along with simply enjoying myself, convey to you the non-fictional and fictional cinematic appeal of what is the very beautiful city of San Cristobal.

The last 16 years of Zapatista history display vast quantities of courage, tenacity, boldness, ingenuity and political astuteness on the part of the Zapatistas (and the indigenous population of Chiapas that they represent) and your standard, heartless, economic rationalism, militarism and two faced politicking on the part of the Mexican Government.

20 De Noviembre
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This statement is problematic though, isn't it?

It suggests to the more cynically minded a willingness to embrace basic good and evil depiction of the universe. It suggests that a mission impossible plot has woven its way into my understanding of a complicated social, political and military reality, informed by a countless number of participants.

To this I can only say I am sorry, but the documentary I watched, my primary source of information on this matter, was able to depict the reality of the situation as complex with no easy solutions, but with the Zapatistas, led by a highly intelligent, well educated, poetically spoken, politically savvy, Sub-Commandant Marcos, navigating a minefield, as if equipped with the latest computerised virtual reality helmet with infra red and yellow and pink and blue... vision and not putting a foot wrong. Either the doco was incredibly good PR or its very hard to find fault with the Zapatistas.

Carpark at Iglesia De Santo Domingo
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On a lighter note…

“Bond, James Bond”

James bond reclines in a bamboo chair in the courtyard restaurant of the Na Balom Hotel (http://www.nabolom.org/hotel/index_en.html) and, having done with introductory pleasantries, proceeds to explain in detail the complex workings of a smuggling operation of which he is claiming to be inextricably a part.

The long legged blond raises an eyebrow, smiles and stares sensuously. Bond responds in a suitably nonchalant, yet flirtatious manner before scanning the courtyard and the rooms surrounding it. Suddenly a motorbike bursts from one of the rooms stopping abruptly at Bonds table. Its rider points a gun at the girls head and pulls her on to the front of the bike before riding off.

Side Entrance to Iglesia De Santo Domingo
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Bond, who has cautiously acquired his firearm from his shoulder holster, fires a shot as the bike rides through the arched entrance to the hotel, only managing to nick the drivers shoulder, a fact due, of course, to the phenomenon of the ‘bond blond concern’. The bike swerves a little, but is soon back on course.

Bond rises rapidly, deposits a bill on the table and runs after the bike. He arrives at a cobbled street where he discovers a parked pizza delivery scooter. With the keys conveniently placed in the ignition he drives off (the pizza delivery man standing in front of an old, arched wooden door, turns and drops his pizza).

Meanwhile, an elderly man, who had been seated at a neighbouring table to Bond and the woman, calls a waiter to him. With a word two waiters are on bonds tail. They climb into a VW beetle (ubiquitous in Mexico) and the tripartite chase is on…

Now we all know what a bond chase scene entails so let me supply, in photographic and descriptive point form, the locations for the primary action - you can fill in the rest (remember one of the blonds legs must be showing at all times and, where possible, you should include: a sweaty fat man in a white suite; cars and bikes performing impressive aeronautical feats and traversing places they normally would not – like the stairs at the Museo de Amber or Iglesia De San Cristobal; large crowds of people – possibly in a festival (the 'Day of the Dead', perhaps - crazy skeletal outfits would definitely add something) or a market and the use of X’s famous gadgetry.

1. General Street Scape

Spanish Architecture dating back to the 16th Century abounds. There are cobbled streets, baroque facades, tradition churches and houses generating joy at a glance with bright red and yellow walls, equally colourful doors and patios bursting with flowers.

2. Iglesia de Santo Domingo

This piety inspiring church has a hoover-like effect on the eyes. The elaborate baroque façade is moulded mortar, which takes on salmon pink tones as the sun slowly sets in the sky. The church is surrounded by a handicraft market with stalls of exotic carvings, jewellery and textiles, that sprawl out in every direction up and down the ancient stairs of the tiered church grounds… its lowest tier licking at the shores of 20 de Noviembre.

3. 20 de Noviembre - The Main Stem

Inside and out the cafes and restaurants of 20 de Noviembre possess a distinct Parisian flavour. Their tables and chairs spill out on to the street and cosmopolitan menus offer organic, vegetarian and carnivorous fare to the diverse cross section of international travelers constantly populating the cities centre. As the commercial centre of the city it is also lined with travel agents, brand outlets and fried chicken and taco chains.

4. Cathedral de San Cristobal

The red, yellow, white, and black that colours the facades complex iconography and statuary represent the four directions, according to the Mayans. The church is predominantly yellow – which is a nice touch really.

The Zapatistas, led by Subcomandante Marcos held public negotiations here with top Mexican officials in the aftermath of the 1994 revolt.

5. Iglesia De San Cristobal (Templo Del Cerrito)

While the church itself, perched on a steep hill, is small and not particularly impressive, the view across the city it affords definitely rewards a visit. The series of horizontal white and brown fenced platforms leading to the church summit, ascended via side stairs, combined with overhanging prayer flags provides quite a visual treat when viewed from the bottom (as I believe the photo above conveys) beckoning even the most lazy traveller to make the climb.

6. Museo De Amber

Positioned beside a well kept park with a maze like hedge row at the base of a long sandstone stair leading to an elevated road that straddles a steep wall perpendicular to the line of the museum, the museum building and its bell towers, as depicted in the top photograph, are a pretty site indeed.

7. The Farmers Market

Stall after stall on top of each other selling fresh produce sourced from surrounding farms (artfully displayed juicy fruits, flowers and raw carcasses) along with electrical appliances, tools, clothing and bare-essentials. It is also a place to get cheap, filling and seemingly hygienic tacos from standing bars (bad guys might feasibly be phoned while downing such delicacies before viewing flying pizza delivery scooters passing overhead).

8. Outside the City

2,120m above sea level, San Cristobal is situated in a lush green valley surrounded by some of Mexico's best scenery and unspoiled natural wonders. It has been argued that Chiapas provides some of the most beautiful scenery in Mexico.

For images of these cinematic places visit: 1. http://www.shunya.net/Pictures/Mexico/mexico02/SanCristobaldeLasCasas/SanCristobal.htm,

2. http://www.ease.com/~randyj/crisfoto.htm)

Whether you are a studio employee scouting for the next Mission Impossible or Bond film or merely a visual enthusiast, like myself, you are bound to enjoy San Cristobal for the fact that its history, architecture, parks, cafes and bars make you wish you’d been handed a script to assist in the delivery of dialogue worthy of the atmosphere you find yourself in.

Now that where on the topic, I think it pertinent to state that Parque Central in Quetzeltenango, Guatemala would be the perfect opening sequence for the film. Possible with an attractive female, or balding, fat and unattractive (but somehow interesting looking) elderly man, or maybe both, seated at the El Balcon Café, over looking the park – a opening helicopter shot would do fine.