Elephants and undies at Koh Samui

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Koh Samui has been a hoot. Definitely more ass than class, but lots of fun. The beaches are lovely. However, the lame tourist strip filled with trashy souvenirs and pub grub are not really my cup of tea. The true treat has been my hotel. Perched on a hill away from the hub bub below its a little rustic Thai sanctuary to soothe the soul (see review on Varinda Resort). The view is beautiful. On my first day there wasn't another guest around, so I had the entire pool to myself and spent the afternoon lazing, swimming, thanking my lucky stars and counting my blessings.

Since then I have had a Thai massage from a lovely lass called Gina (something tells me that's not her real name), had a pedicure on the beach, got a henna tattoo (!), and been elephant trekking in the Samui highlands. The elephants were fantastic. I was kind of swaying a little manically atop this gorgeous creature and thinking how wonderful it all was, when it suddenly took the biggest dump in history. You could have filled a few duffle bags with it!

Definitely more ass than class

I also visited a Buddhist monument (the Big Buddha). Just as I was about to ascend the stairs the Buddha police blew their whistle at me and informed me that I was disrespectfully dressed. No probs, I thought, I have a sarong to sling over my shoulders, what I'd forgotten was that I also had a pair of lacey undies rolled in the sarong (for after swimming!) that dropped out. Right there on the front steps of the holy monument!!! There was a long pause of sheer mortification as a few people just stood and stared at my undies on the step, and then.....well I bent down and picked them up and pretended that nothing had happened....of course.