On the Rocks

wait for us!
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A very hungover Kiwi bus made its way to today’s first stop, the BushMan’s Centre – a museum dedicated to deer stalking and possum baiting, run by a man remarkably similar to Les, but 30 years younger (his son perhaps?). It was surprisingly entertaining, with a few well place practical jokes along the way (usually at Rich’s expense!). Dan experimented with a taste of possum pie – tasted like plain old meat pie apparently.

Arriving in the town of Franz Josef, we could not help but be impressed by the snow capped mountain scenery. The main attraction here is the Franz Josef glacier, the steepest and fastest flowing commercially guided glacier in the world. We were all quite excited at the prospect of hiking up it tomorrow.

a block of ice fell and amputated his legs!

Girls on top
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Next morning we arrived bright and early at the glacier hike departure point, where we were kitted out with a waterproof jacket, boots, crampons, and a pair of wooly mittens. After signing our lives away (how dangerous can a walk be?) we were led by a series of guides on a rocky 45 minute walk to the face of the glacier, passing numerous warning signs en route, declaring EXTREME DANGER, FALLING ICE and DO NOT ENTER, giving us the first inkling that today’s hike may not be just a simple walk in the park.

You could get a bus through there!
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Up close, the sheer size of the glacier was overwhelming, and its apparent instability was quite worrying. Water was pouring off it and from under it, boulders of ice and rock were rolling down it and there was the occasional groaning noise of something very big moving either within it or on it. To make matters worse, the first story our guide told us was of an incident that happened only four days ago to a man who was standing in the wrong place at the wrong time when a block of ice fell and amputated his legs! – This is definitely not going to be a walk in the park!

Stop taking photos and help me!
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The next step was to choose what ability group we would like to be in, either slow, medium or ‘sh*t hot’. Not wanting to look like wimps we both followed the lead of Dutchie, Dana, Stef, Rick, Seb and Matheus and joined the ‘sh*t hot’ group, whose task was to lead the way, setting the pace and carving the route for the following groups. Our guide, Dale, didn’t seem to care much for our inexperience on glaciers with his main piece of advice before setting off being “just don’t fall!” So with our crampons fastened tightly to our boots we were off.

Ooooh, it's licking me!
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To begin with, the hike consisted of walking up precut steps in the ice and along well trodden pathways along the glacier’s lower slopes, however, as we started to climb higher the real adventure began. We were each given an ice axe to assist us as the walls we began to scale became steeper and steeper, and the ice was so smooth you couldn’t grip anywhere with your hands or fingers. Our guide had a large ice axe that he would use to chop hobbit sized toe holes for us and then just race off leaving us to clamber up behind him. It started to become scary when you found yourself slipping eight meters up with nothing below but jagged ice and rocks. We found that your knees do actually knock together when you are fearing for your life. Needless to say there was a lot of team effort involved to get us all safely through – pushing, pulling and putting your hands on relative strangers where you normally wouldn’t put them. In particular Seb, Matheus and Rick saved me and Claire on more than one occasion – thanks guys!

The Franz Josef glacier
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After about five hours of creeping along thin ledges one hundred feet high, straddling crevasses that looked bottomless and stepping over large round holes in the ice that could have been over half a mile deep, our efforts were finally rewarded. The views from our finishing spot were stunning and looking down the valley to where we started climbing gave a great sense of achievement. The glacier itself also looked more beautiful nearer the top as the fresh ice was a surreal bright blue colour and in certain places had melted to form caves and tunnels. After food and photos it was time to head for home and thankfully the return journey was an easier, more direct one.

...even time for a pose
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Back at the bar, we celebrated our achievements (and survival!) with a few well earned drinks. It was a great personal challenge and an incredible experience but one we might not rush to repeat too soon!