Cycling China: The Highs and Lows of Mountainous Yunnan, plus our Rural China Survival Guide

Donkeys checking us out at a pass after Zhongdian.
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Who knew that China had phenomenal bike touring?  I'm sure someone did, but we didn't and were very happily surprised.  Yunnan Province has fantastic roads, minority villages, yummy food, comfy tourist towns and beautiful mountain views - all at rock-bottom prices.

We started our journey in Dali and rode up through Yunnan to Zhongdian, and after into Sichuan Province.  Along the way, we checked out Dali's laid-back hippie vibe and Lijiang's strange mix of charming old town and off-putting Chinese tourist drunk fest.  Both are touristy, and a little cheesy, versions of minority towns, but definitely good for a few-days' stopover.

It's almost cycling heaven.

As a bike tourist in rural China, you end up as much a sight yourself as you are a viewer of sights.
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The biking highlight was undoubtedly the long road from the Tiger Leaping Gorge around to Zhongdian.  It's almost cycling heaven.  No traffic, perfect pavement, hard but reasonable climbs, long descents, fine views, and interesting minority villages along the way.  Tiger Leaping Gorge is, ahem, gorge-ous.  This is one of the best 200 km (or so) of biking we've seen anywhere.

Zhongdian - renamed Shangri-la after the James Hilton novel as a tourist push by the Chinese government - is a cool but very touristy Tibetan town, the first of many you encounter heading north into Sichuan.  Cycling northwest from Zhongdian, there's a phenomenal 26-kilometer, 1400-meter descent back to the Yangtze River.

A tiger at the entrance to the Tiger Leaping Gorge, so named because a legend holds that a tiger once leaped to safety across the narrow gorge while escaping a Yi hunter.
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Going through small villages with lots of curious cute kids and kind adults was another highlight of biking Yunnan.  It's a completely different lifestyle from what we know, and it was great to have the chance to see it and interact with people who have such a different perspective from our own.

We were also thrilled with all the scrumptious spicy food we had, especially in the city of Kunming, where flew from Mandalay.  Also surprisingly yummy was yak stew, and yak meat in general.  Perhaps the best meal deal on the planet can be found after dark in just about any Chinese town: BBQ stands where you can gorge yourself on delicious marinated meats, tofu, and every kind of vegetable imaginable for about $2 per person, including beers.

A beautiful sunset over Er Hai Lake, near Dali.
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Rural China Tourists' Survival Guide:

The other side of the coin, the cloud within the silver lining, if you will, is that China can be a challenging country in which to travel if you're an unacquainted westerner.  This is exponentially more true in rural China.  Here's our take on some of the most obvious head-scratchers (and a few unexpected puzzlers, to boot).

**  Tourist or Attraction:  Which are you?  Well, you're a little bit of both.  If you're on a bike, you're actually more an attraction than anything else.  Many people will stare at you as if you have horns growing from your head or something.  What, you didn't know you were a circus freak?  Well think again, my friend.  Don't take it personally.  Just look straight ahead and take a deep breath, then break the ice with a quick nod and a "Ni hao."

People working the fields near Er Hai Lake. Farming is low-tech here - people get out there and work the land with human labor.
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** Bathrooms:  To get straight to the point, China's are among the yuckiest in the world. Even in cities, and that means even in your lovely hotel room, there is a certain aroma that I can actually remember-smell when I think of it. But in villages, forget about it. Expect dirt or concrete outhouses with open backs through which the poop shoots dispense their goodness into the unsuspecting earth.  Hold your nose, hold your breath, squint your eyes, whatever you need to do. But good grief don't close your eyes: there's a real chance you could slip right into the poop shoot!

A temple in the mountains west of Lijiang.
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** VOLUME!:  People play REALLY LOUD music, talk LOUDLY to each other and on their cell phones in restaurants and in hotel halls - it's a completely different ethic for how you should behave in public.  People will yell and slam doors in the hall of your hotel - not just sometimes but routinely.  It's normal.  Takes a bit of getting used to, and I guess we didn't really get used to it.

** Alcohol tutorial: Acquaint yourself with the available sorts of alcohol for those nights you want to let your hair hang down and have a good time. First, there's Tsingtao beer. Also, there's baiju, which is rice liquor. Okay, I think that pretty much sums it up!

The welcome note at one of our hotels. Really, though, they get props for even offering it in English (or darn close, anyway).
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** The unexpected American redneck - young Chinese man connection:  Until our trip, we would not have understood the humor of: If you often get rip-roarin' drunk on beer and shots of cheap liquor, yell, sing, hug your friends, and rip your own shirt off .... you might be a young Chinese man! Jes thought she'd worm-holed back to high school in Oklahoma!  Try not to stare too obviously if you witness this ritual.

** Ubiquitous smoking:  This applies in the city, too.  Nearly every male over the age of 14 smokes cigarettes and does so constantly, fervently, and with complete disregard for whether you like it or not. To be fair, I think the idea it might bother someone doesn't really exist in China. But boy is it a rough shock coming from California. People smoke in elevators, on buses, in restaurants, in hotel hallways (this sometimes is accompanied by drinking and yelling), in taxis, in internet cafes, wherever!

Women dancing in Lijiang. It's mostly for show here, but in most villages people dance in the afternoons as recreation and fun.
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** Honking:  It's constant and unending, but it's kindly meant.  They're telling you they're coming so you aren't surprised or hurt when they pass close by you in a hurtling, diesel-spewing death truck.  This can be a little frightening on a bicycle.

Basically, rural China can be frustrating and often overwhelming. Stay more than a few days, and you'll likely tire of dirty guesthouses, monotonous food and drink, and generally rough going. But after you leave, you might find that the comforts you had longed for are a bit boring, and you'll probably wish you could go back and do it all again.  In rural China we experienced a place that's definitely no place like home.  And that's part of what this trip is all about, after all ...