More to do than you Sphinx

At the temple of Hatchepsut
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The southern cities of Luxor and Aswan have much to offer, as I discovered when I took a trip down the Nile. This guide attempts to fill you on the bits you should definitely do, the bits you should probably do and the bits not to do in any circumstances when exploring all that Southern Egypt has to offer. In my humble opinion, that is.

Upon arrival in Egypt, probably one of the first things you will clap eyes on is a caleche. These things are more common on Egyptian roads than cars and are basically horse drawn carriages. Don’t get any illusions of romantic, wedding-like transportation though, as they are about as far as you could get from that. Think tacky brass ornamentation and rickety wheels. On the plus side though, they only cost about £1 an hour for a ride and will take you wherever you like in that hour. It is important you stipulate your route and destination though, because if you just ask the driver to drive his horse will conveniently need a rest right outside his uncle’s papyrus shop. Funny, that.

Do not believe any small child named Mohammed who swears to you your camel’s name is Mish Mish...

At the temple of Hatchepsut
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It is also important to arrange a price prior to entering the caleche and to ensure that this price is inclusive of all passengers for the entire journey - not per head. Other things to check are the condition of the horse -many are so thin they struggle to carry an empty caleche, let alone one with you and three of your mates in.  Also, run your hand over the seat of the caleche before you get in. Many drivers shine up their seats with shoe polish, which won’t look very attractive smeared all over the back of your fave white skirt/ shorts.

A lovely Egyptian sunset
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However, a caleche is a relaxing way to cover a great distance with the minimum of effort - something you’ll undoubtedly be grateful of in the baking midday heat of Egypt. It also allows you to take in the sights without the fear of being pestered by vendors. The drivers are often good for a few tales and tips too.

On the streets of both Luxor and Aswan, two types of people will immediately introduce themselves to you; caleche drivers and fellucca owners. A fellucca is basically is small sailboat, seating three people including the sailor. Hundreds of them zig-zag up and down the Nile and the owners are more than keen to take you out on them. Again, quite cheap at £1.50 (per group), but there is one thing to bear in mind. Make sure that there is a breeze. Fellucca owners will still offer to take you out on the stillest day, which is fine if you want to spend an hour motionless in the middle of the Nile, but not so great if you’re after a bit of movement. Felluccas are slightly more romantic than the caleche, although the Nile is not the sweetest smelling river in the world, if you catch my drift.

Adrian on a camel
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Now you can’t go to Egypt and not have a ride on a camel. Possibly the most uncomfortable animal to attempt to ride, but a great laugh all the same. A ride will cost you about £3 and that is for about 10 minutes worth of bum-numbing. Ensure that the camel looks healthy - they do whiff a bit, but make sure they don’t honk too bad, as this is a sign of mistreatment. Do not underestimate how high up you are on a camel, ensure that the seat looks secure and that you have something to hold onto - as the ride will be bumpy. Also, do not believe any small child named Mohammed who swears to you your camel’s name is Mish Mish. This phrase actually gees the camel up to a canter. Oh well, I suppose it gave the Egyptians a laugh...

Karnak temple
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And now for a bit of culture. Egypt is home to some of the most amazing architecture around, so if temples are your thing, then prepare to be amazed. In a week I squeezed in six temples, each one different from the last. Built by the Ancient Egyptians and dedicated to their Gods, all words along the lines of breath-taking, phenomenal and awesome apply. And let’s face it; a visit to Egypt wouldn’t be complete without having a butcher’s at a temple or two. So just do it.

Also the Valley of the Kings is worth a look. Your entrance ticket entitles you to enter three tombs and there is the option to visit Tutankhamoun’s pad for a few extra pennies. Beware the plain-clothes guards who will point out the odd carving to you and then expect a tip. It is also worth remembering that there is no photography allowed in the tombs and that all video cameras must be checked in upon entering the Valley. The whole feeling of the place is indescribable and definitely a highlight of my trip.

At the temple of Hatchepsut
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Why not go to the Aswan dam? Not much to see to be honest, but it’s the first thing anyone will ask you when you say you’ve been to Aswan. I mean, what else is Aswan famous for? Dam little else...

One of the most interesting and humbling things I did whilst in lower Egypt was to visit a Nubian village. When the Aswan dam was built in the 1960’s, Nubia was flooded by Lake Nasser forcing all of its inhabitants to flea. They rebuilt their communities on a series of islands and guides will take you across to them on trips for very little money. On the sail across, there is also the opportunity to get closer to some Egyptian nature. We had a brush with a baby crocodile, but there are also rare birds, water buffalo and geckos to be seen. The Nubians are very welcoming to visitors to the island and invite you into their homes to tell you about how they live. They also provide refreshments - and so it is polite to tip on departure. Authentic Nubian henna tattoos are also available (30p) and there are the usual gifts available for purchase. The only difference is that Nubian vendors do not hassle visitors, which I found a refreshing change after the constant harassment on display in both Aswan and Luxor.

There are so many directions for you to take when discovering southern Egypt. From the typical tourist route around the temples and famous attractions to the insightful route learning about the Egyptian culture and their way of life, the options are limitless. Plus, you can rest assured that no matter which direction you opt to take in southern Egypt, a caleche driver will be able to get you there.

Top five temples to visit in southern Egypt:

1) Edfu 2) Kom Ombo (the only temple with actual mummies inside. Ok, they are crocodile mummies, but still...) 3) Karnak 4) Hatchepsut 5) Luxor temple

Top five other things to see:

1) Nubian village 2) Valley of the Kings 3) The Old Cataract Hotel (where Agatha Christie famously wrote Death on the Nile. But if you’re not into that, they have a really nice terrace where you can drink tea and eat cakes...) 4) Aswan bazaar (hardcore hagglers only) 5) Luxor Mummification Museum (your only chance in southern Egypt to see an authentic human mummy)

Don’t leave southern Egypt until you have...

1) Been in a caleche 2) Been in a fellucca 3) Had a bash at belly dancing 4) Worn a galabiyah (authentic Egyptian dress) 5) Had a proper Nubian henna tattoo.