Driving ALL NIGHT to see the Hermitage

Man grabbing ass. Really - this is Rembrant's The Prodigal Son and these hands are actually from the same man on his son's shoulders. It has been suggested that Rembrant drew one masculine and one feminine to represent family values.
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It’s 3am, and we’re leaving Moscow. Let me explain why. We originally planned our trip itinerary, made reservations and booked airlines before we figured out we were going to be in St. Petersburg for the day on a Monday. This is only a problem because the Hermitage, St. Petersburg’s most popular tourist site, is closed on Mondays. We estimated the drive to be about 10 hours, so if we left at a reasonable time we would arrive Sunday after it closes at 5pm. We decided not to be reasonable. We hoped to get there before noon, and we had set up our tour guide to meet us at the hotel at 1pm locking us into the decision.

The entrance to the Hermitage
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We were a little anxious but we weren’t going to miss the Hermitage. Also, we knew that for this Northern region of Russia we’re approaching the time of the White Nights, where daylight disappears for very short periods each night. It was already quite bright by 3am and by 3:45am we had full daylight.

We got off to an odd start because we were picky about gas stations and broke the law. We were on the highway and pulled off at a run down station that was probably closed, but saw a shiny new one across the highway. It wasn’t that crowded so… we crossed. When we returned to the highway a passing police car caught up to us. This started a very entertaining process in which Alex and Jon thoroughly frustrated a laughing cop and his partner with a lot of “we don’t understand” hand-waving. In spite of the fact that we totally understood his comment of “100 rubles,” after about 10-15 minutes in frustration he just waved us on. We enjoyed every second. I almost wanted to go back and pay the man.

The tour guide Anasatasia explaining to Alex he's not that cute.
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We have 450 miles to go and there is absolutely nothing between Moscow and St. Petersburg – it’s rather third world-ish. The roads can be quite entertaining. By 6am it was raining, and it never stopped. After 10 hours of driving, mostly in the rain (did I say that already?), we reached St. Petersburg. Our theory that you can find your hotel in any Russian city with 4 points of contact (or less) held up. Once again we arrived almost magically through hand-waving and body movements. We arrived a little after 1pm, wet and tired with our guide, Anastasia, waiting for us outside. She gave us a few minutes to put the bikes away, change clothes and we took off for the Hermitage.

Jon is.
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The Hermitage is an 18^th century Winter Palace of Russian Tzars. It’s a little like touring Versailles in which you are viewing both a beautiful palace and its contents. The palace is in the center of the city, enormous, and very brightly painted. Everything in St. Petersburg is painted with bright colors as mandated by Peter the Great to offset the rainy drab atmosphere. Much of the palace is gilded with gold leaf, the floors are all wood parquet and no two rooms are the same. There are over a 1000 rooms. Show offs. The art collection was impressive. We saw one of the largest collections of Rembrants who died poor because these Russians purchased this collection for pennies before he became well known. The collection also includes a DaVinci, a Michaelangelo sculpture, Rubens, and way too many Dutch and Italian pieces.

Entrance hallway to the palace. Nice ceiling.
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All in all, we’re not sure this is what we expected, but we invested a lot into the experience and glad we did it. We had an early dinner, fought sleeping through it despite the great company. Bleary eyed, Jon tried to pay the bill with a 5000 Hungarian Forints note. A 5000 Ruble note is rare and the waiter tried to hand it back. Jon indignantly handed it back to the waiter insisting that he accept it. We both thought he just didn’t want to break the large bill (about $150 US). The old man shrugged and walked away with it. We realized our mistake and Jon went running after him to find him and five other men in a huddle behind the bar discussing the bill. Jon yelled “Nyet, nyet, nyet” and they all started laughing. We stumbled back to our hotel and crashed.