Bali International Diving Professionals

Yes, some would say this is flagrant advertizing, others might claim this is brazen, opinionated favouritism without recourse to experiencing other companies. Well, bollocks to the rabble, I don't care.

BIDP (the acronym for the title of this piece) are a wholly Balinese dive outfit who really do know their stuff. No Australians, Germans, Dutch, Czechs or Brits are involved in any way in any of their operations and this (if you have never been to Bali or Indonesia), upon first sight, could be enough to put you off if you have ever travelled on any Indonesian transport service (you know, those ferries, back of a scooter-taxi in Jakarta, Garuda Airlines, etc.). Well, this really does go to show the pitfalls of stereotyping: the guys and gals at BIDP must be either from another planet entirely or they are quite simply great human beings with a genuine interest in what they do and the people they take diving.

Right from the off, when researching the Mola-Mola dive season and searching for dive companies, BIDP were informative, expansive and courteously efficient. No hard sell (as I didn't actually reply to their initial quote and package for several months) was needed and I regularly kept changing my mind, but there was always a very chirpy reply and nothing was too much trouble. They may have lots of different accommodation on their website, but they can reach many more.

I eventually chose a three day dive stint on Nusa Lembongan staying at the Tanis Villas (family run bungalow/restaurant establishment) followed by a mellow three days in Ubud doing the eco-cycle thing and drifting with the flotsam from cafe to cafe, craft-shop to craft-shop, staying at Agung Raka bungalows. Quiet and very pleasant.

If you do your research, the best (fish, as opposed to metal) diving on Bali is unquestionably where the strong currents are, and these are around Penida and Lembongan.

From the arrival to the departure gates at the airport, BIDP had taken care of the lot: transfers, hotels, tours and, obviously, the diving. Being a bit anal, I am used to doing things for myself (like checking my dive kit, putting it all together, carrying it, etc) and BIDP were happy for this to happen, but equally, as I watched, they were happy to do the PADI dive guide thing and pick up and put together everything for the other divers who were there as well. They were impressive with the checking of certification (almost casually, not a Eastern European or Germanic "Let me haff your divink qvalifikazionz now", rather, "Do you mind if I take a peek in your logbook?") and the logistics of pick up, deposit, towels (DRY TOWELS after a dive!); lunch (it may have been in a box but it was fantastic: especially the Nasi Goring); briefing and guide deployment. The last of these, the guides were, perhaps, the best bit of all.

As we were barrelling across the strait between Sanur and Nusa Penida (and being impressed by the ocean swell and bubbling currents clearly evident all around us) it was good to see that the guides seemed genuinely interested in having a chat with all the divers and where there was a pregnant pause, talking about the currents and the history of the islands. What really brought home to me was the sheer chirpiness of every one of them, on this occasion being almost aggressively threatened with a "If we don't see a Mola-Mola we don't have to pay you, right?" question from a Japanese couple! My own instinct would have been to throw them and their monstrous load of photographic kit over the side, but these guys smiled and aid, " We can promise you Sun (pointing up at the blazing orb) and fish (pointing down beneath the waves)." Big smile from them, nothing like fom the serious photographic treasure hunters, though. Apparently the guides get this loads...the ignorance of the virtual-online-comes -with-an-all-inclusive -guarantee-or-your-money -back-new-age-diver-with -all-the-gadgets-and-no -brain (wankers). Anyway, as it was, when we got to Crystal Bay (along with other boats from other outfits absolutely spilling over with divers), we all got to see eight Mola-Mola effortlesly gliding through the shimmering thermoclines (when they weren't being crowded off into the blue from a barrage of wankers with cameras). What made our two dives really good, though was that we weren't packed in like sardines like on all the other boats which were there. Furthermore, our guys took us (in pairs: ratio one guide to two divers) clear of the wankers as far as possible, but always safely away from the currents, even after they were sure we could fin well and keep our bouyancy in control (again, which they did almost imperceptively, but check they most certainly did). On returning to the surface all the guides asked us what we saw and they were all genuinely interested. Then, oh, the dry towels....

I spent the night on Lembongan at The Tanis Villas, a really good budget place: great food, a view of the local fishing boat fleet (wooden Polynesian outrigger affairs) and of the volcano on Bali. And then there's the cold bottles of Bintang. Delicious. Magic. All the other superlatives you can muster. If you're posh, you can ponce about in more expensive places as well, but really Lembongan ain't that sort of place. Local and chilled. Very. No need for bullshit here.

The following day really made BIDP the dog's cahunas, though. With a smaller speedboat (which they keep on the island) I was picked up the following morning and asked where I would like to dive! Well you'd be a complete fool/tool/member (delete as necessary) if you didn't say Crystal Bay at this time of the year, as the Mola-Mola were certainly there, and as I was already on the island, we would the first boat there! Needless to say we spent almost half an hour alone with another eight of these enormous and beautiful fish, two of whom were so close we could have groomed them ourselves! With their huge eyes looking at me only centimetres from my mask, it was truly a humbling experience. We were only interrupted by the sudden flash of cameras and a wall of fins and bubbles which careered right through us and caused the Mola-Mola to almost effortlessly glide off without so much as a middle finger for the mass of bubbling would-be paparazzi who had arrived from another centre. By the time they had surfaced, we had gone and were, again, first on the spot diving with the Manta Rays at Manta Point!

The wall dives at Ceningan were equally impressive for the sheer visibility and dramatic drop off. Schools of all sorts hunted here, the most impressive being the big tuna that flew like missiles everywhere in the fast current.

Personally, I could have stayed on Lembongan for the whole week, but as a craft shop was required, Ubud beckoned. Here again, all transfers and hotel bookings went swimmingly and I enjoyed the great food, Storm beer (try it, it really is the best Ale in Asia) and the Bali Eco Tour bike ride down the mountain. The highlight of that excursion was a dry land video wanker who had a bit of a spill as he was more interested in filming than where he was actually going. With all these things: videos, cameras, etc. aren't the most vivid memories the air, the people and the actual doing of the thing more important than posed shots and virtual playbacks?  Anyway, Ubud was without a doubt the most relaxing and stress-free shopping excursion I have ever had. Okay, haggling is necessary (especially when the vendors start off with a ludicrously high figure), but it is just a game and you don't have to buy anything! As long as you remember, it's a way of life for them and it's disposable income for you.

I'll be returning again and again to this great place whose people are just so nice! Bali and BIDP I mean!